Reach-out and unload

It took me good time to learn this and now when I have gotten into this habit of unloading myself honestly...I feel free and HONEST. 

It is always good to reach-out and express how you feel than to keep wrestling with your thoughts making you weary and evil...because you know YOU JUST CANNOT. Now it has all gone taking a U-turn from what I had been. I always thought 'the least we expect from others, the happiest we stay'....it worked quite well, however, this theory doesn't work all the time. People who love you want you to need them!!! It always is depressing if you don't... . If they choose you to be there when they need you they want you to do the same. You in your love-circle aren't expected to be only an 'angel'!! Compassion in a relationship is a mutual thing or else you don't deserve to be in one.

Socializing has been a great hobby and I had plenty of friends always there with me. My friends kept telling me all the time that I stood as a true friend and that I was sweet, genuine and one of the best they could have in their lives. I remember now that they always tried to be there when I was upset but they also wanted me to tell them that I needed them that I wanted them to do things for me; something that I never did. Funny thing is that I have only those still in my life and by my side whom I really asked to be there! I never wanted others to go away!!! also, my not asking others did not mean I didn't need them or I didn't love them!!!

Now,when I know this, I have gone back to reach-out as long as I could to tell people that they were and are important and I cared...and that, in my life, I never wanted them to go away.

Expressing has also made my life better. In a family, we keep on 'expecting' others to understand us without even getting to hear anything from us!!! How can that be possible? So I learnt to tell what I need, how I feel, why I feel so and that has made life much more easier than ever. Words create magic when used properly. They bring in faith, love and honesty.

So, go on. Unload..:)

Educating a girl child???

Mind is a running machine 24x7 and you cannot help but surrender to this. There are hundred many questions that puzzle me all the time.

Educating a female child, well, has that really blessed them to live an improved life? Are they really free to think, to decide or even to live? If something is ending up in emotional breakdown, long phases of depression and finally a heart full of coldness and respect-less love for the partner, why at all education is important?

I used to think and was told several times that I thought completely differently and selfishly. I stopped being selfish but could not help thinking “differently”. The unselfish me started becoming social as expected and to my relief and surprise I realized that the women of all ages, if they were educated, thought the same way I did and almost everyone of them were announced selfish and were told to stop thinking “selfishly”!!!

Who is responsible, our parents, the society, system or women themselves? The Head of the Department in a very well known Private University says, “I had to fight all my way to keep my dreams alive and that has given me a face of self-centered and heartless selfish woman in the family.” Another statement from a colleague comes, “no matter what all you sacrifice and compromise with, the status is not going to change and you realize it after you spent some considerable time in marriage!!”

Why at all they need to feel guilty to be independent, to be earning their own money? A daughter is educated, given all the freedom to dream about and achieve her ambitions and is told several times by her parents and society how very proud of her they are for being what she is!!! And then she is married…married to someone who himself is very-well educated and a 'settled' man. Life is good and peaceful but with different responsibilities altogether. What made the family feel proud of her becomes a cause of chaos!! She is  selfish if she wants to study, work as the rolr changes post marriage. However, unfortunately, what she holds on her as her responsibility of taking care and nurturing the family is not acknowledged because ironically that is her very obvious DUTY and no achievement. And here ends the story in a helpless-hope that some day things will get better and get under control, in consoling herself that she had her time in life and now its turn to live for the family and make them happy.